High Anxiety

 I started a new job a few summers ago, and on the first day of work, I had my first anxiety episode. Yes people, Christians have anxiety too, and it is okay because we are human. I was in orientation class and just felt like I was having trouble breathing, and my left arm was hurting, so I thought I was having a heart attack. We went on a tour of the facility, and my breathing felt like it was beginning to feel constrained. I got back to the conference room and the other people went to lunch, and I fell to the ground, breathing heavy and my heart was pounding in my chest. I called my wife; and my daughter and son came to get me, but before they came, the paramedics had arrived. They ran test on me and said sit up and breath, you’re fine and your numbers look good. I started breathing as instructed and felt better. My son, when I got into the car said, “welcome to the world of anxiety.”

Jesus in His sermon on the mount, talked about a lot of different situations and instructions, and also wrote about being anxious. Matthew  six beginning in verse twenty five said, 

“"Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?” (ESV‬‬) 

At the end of it Jesus concludes with, 

“Therefore do not be anxious, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” ‭(ESV‬‬)

Paul reminds us in Philippians Four, 

“do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” (‭ESV‬‬) 

I read these and thought, my faith isn’t strong, I must be doing something wrong, but then I remembered that I’m a work in progress and life is tough, and it is okay if we have moments of anxiety. It doesn’t make us frail and or wrong, as I think that Jesus knew we still would worry. He was our example and also gave us these verses to remember how much we need Jesus. David cries out in Psalm Sixty one, one through four,

“HEAR MY CRY, O God, listen to my prayer; from the end of the earth I call to You when MY HEART IS FAINT. LEAD ME TO THE ROCK that is higher than I, for You have been MY REFUGE, A STRONG TOWER AGAINST THE ENEMY. Let me DWELL IN YOUR TENT FOREVER! Let me take refuge under the SHELTER OF YOUR WINGS! Selah” (ESV) (Emphasis added)

We are human and our hearts grow faint, but it’s not that that we grow faint, but where do we turn when we do? Drugs don’t help, alcohol is just as bad, therapists are like mediums, in that they only use key words to try and pry tears from you. The enemy uses lies to make us feel inadequate and lost, just like he did with Adam and Eve, by lying to them that they could be like God. But all it did was leave them outside of Eden after it was all said and done. Perfection isn’t attainable without Jesus as much as we try, and even Jesus dealt with anxiety as we read in Luke Twenty Two beginning in verse forty one, 

“And He withdrew from them about a stone’s throw, and knelt down and prayed, saying, “Father, if You are willing, remove this cup from Me. Nevertheless, NOT MY WILL, BUT YOURS, be done.” And there appeared to Him an angel from heaven, strengthening Him. And BEING IN AGONY HE PRAYED MORE EARNESTLY; and HIS SWEAT BECAME like great drops of blood falling down to the ground.” (ESV) (Emphasis added)

Before you write hate posts, listen to what I am saying. Jesus is God and He was showing us how we should look to God in prayer, in the Spirit and allow God’s will to be done. I grew up memorizing the “Lord’s prayer” as a Catholic during the rosary,  and reciting “Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven,” so why wouldn’t we believe and follow that? Again, it’s okay to doubt, have fear, wonder why, but to also remember that Jesus went through the agony of death on a cross, so that we wouldn’t have to.

Paul was human and dealt with lots of persecution, and he also knew that we would be anxious in a world gone crazy, so it was a reminder for us to not be anxious, but that only really happens in Christ. I’ve learned that it helps me and reminds me to just stop and pray and seek God more in those times. It’s easy to be like Peter and focus on the storms instead of God, but we have to stop and breath and remember that God is our peace. Peace that the world will never understand, and as I’ve grown deeper into God’s word, I’m learning to set my life on Him and not on things of me.  I love what Psalm One Hundred Twenty-one says,

“I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? He will not let your foot be moved; He who keeps you will not slumber.” (ESV)

I think Psalm Ninety one is deeper in meaning of evil and anxiety, but listen to what the Psalmist says beginning in verse one, 

“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, “My Refuge and my Fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” For He will deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with His pinions, and under His wings you will find refuge; His faithfulness is a shield and buckler. You will not fear the terror of the night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness, nor the destruction that wastes at noonday.” (ESV)

So in those times of anxiety where do you seek help? Where is your refuge and shelter,  and your trust for deliverance? The world is full of chaos and the terror of night is everywhere, but Jesus has overcome it all. It may not seem that God cares or exists, but don’t lose hope, even in your anxiety. Jesus comforts us in some of my favorite verses, Matthew Eleven beginning in verse twenty eight,  

“Come to Me, all who LABOR AND ARE HEAVY LADEN, and I will GIVE YOU REST. Take my yoke upon you, and LEARN FROM ME, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you WILL FIND REST FOR YIUR SOULS. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”” (ESV)

Jesus doesn’t say that you will find rest in your bodies, in your workload, in your burdens or life, but He says, you will find rest in your souls! The solution is so simple that so many think us crazy for how Jesus can save us, and the world still struggles and tries all the solutions out there, but the choice is yours! Do you repent and come into Jesus rest, or do you stay anxious? When in reality, it truly is nothing, and it leaves us restless!.” Jose Barajas

Steadfast Love

 “My mom being over ninety years old, and still going strong thru her difficult circumstances, and by those I mean, she uses a walker, has diabetes,  and still doesn’t let that weigh her down. She has a memory in that me and my brother play the Psalms for her and she memorizes them after Three times listening to them. She tells stories from her youth and throughout her lifetime, and I’m amazed of what she remembers. The other thing is that her love for each of her kids, Ten of us, is steadfast and constant, regardless of what we’ve said or done in our past. I am sure that she remembers everything we’ve done, but never brings it up to us. She may not agree with all of our ways and beliefs, but her love never changes and her prayers are always filled for each of her children. 

Lamentations Three, written by Jeremiah, references or foretells of Jesus on the cross, and prophesied  the things He will endure and have happen. The beauty of this chapter reminds us,  

“Remember my affliction and my wanderings, the wormwood and the gall! My soul continually remembers it and is bowed down within me. But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The STEADFAST LOVE of the Lord NEVER CEASES; HIS MERCIES NEVER come to an end; they are NEW WVERY MORNING; great is your faithfulness. "The Lord is my portion," says my soul, "therefore I will HOPE IN HIM."” ‭(ESV‬‬) 

My mom always tells me that God knows her afflictions and still her faith never wavers. I know God has known my wanderings, even when I have willfully wandered from Him, and still His mercies have been renewed every morning. This isn’t a license to keep sinning or to keep wandering in the mire of our selfish pride, but daily we should be putting our hope in Him. 

The bitterness and hardship my mom has endured to provided and love for each of us and our dad, could be said of any loving parent. My mom remembers the things that have happened in her life, and through it all she humbled her heart daily to God, knowing He was leading her through it. David writes in Psalm One Hundred and Three, and the whole Psalm is a beautiful remembrance of God’s steadfast love, says beginning in verse eight,

“The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and ABOUNDING IN STEADFAST LOVE. He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever. He DOES NOT DEAL WITH US ACCORDING TO OUR SINS, nor repay us according to our iniquities. For AS HIGH as the heavens are above the earth, so GREAT IS HIS steadfast love toward those who fear him; as FAR as the east is from the west, so far does HE REMOVE OUR transgressions from us.”  (ESV) (Emphasis added)

When we repent, God erases our past of rebellion of Him, and reminds us each morning, that as High as the heavens are, so is His steadfast love. The love that came to die for each person ever to have walked, is walking, and will walk on this earth, for anyone who will receive it, the choice is yours to make. Your body can ache and your mind may be a mess, but Jeremiah writes, that his SOUL says, “The Lord is his portion!” 

I am learning to be like that, and calling to mind all the times God has blessed us, when it seemed there was no hope, but my soul was at peace. I know that like my mom; God’s love is steadfast, and as much as my mom does love us, it doesn’t compare to God’s eternal and steadfast love. The beauty is that regardless of what we’ve done and felt the day before, He renews our soul daily, and it never comes to an end. It reminds me of what David says in Psalm four verse eight,

“In peace I will both lie down and sleep; for You alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.” (ESV)

Can you say that? Can you lie down to sleep in peace? Only in Jesus can we find true rest and peace, the problems won’t disappear, but we can DWELL in His safety. We all one day will come to an end, so my questions is, where will you put your hope? I love my mom with all my breath, but my true love and hope is in Jesus, and in God the Father, that thru His Holy Spirit, will save me and never leave me, even after my end here on earth. My prayer is that you also come  and see the goodness of the Lord before the end. I pray Jesus is your portion, and that it may also be “well” within your soul.” Jose Barajas

R.E.M. (It’s The End; (And I Feel Fine)

“Nineteen Eighty Seven, I had just graduated high school and thought the world was going crazy then, nothing has changed. I’ve stated we were known as generation X, and between nuclear war, global warming and other crazy things, we had no hope, and seems less today. I was not going to the Catholic Church anymore, and felt like what was the point, as it seemed God was not listening. R.E.M. came out with a song, “It’s The End of The World As We Know It” and here are some of the lyrics. “That's great, it starts with an earthquake; Birds and snakes, and aeroplanes; And Lenny Bruce is not afraid; Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn; World serves its own needs; Don't mis-serve your own needs” “And a government for hire and a combat site;; Uh oh, overflow, population, common group; But it'll do, save yourself, serve yourself; World serves its own needs, listen to your heart bleed; Tell me with the Rapture and the reverent in the right, right; You vitriolic, patriotic, slam fight, bright light; Feeling pretty psyched” It was our anthem at the end of a decade, that began with hostages being held in Iran, and ended with the fall of the Berlin Wall. My hope was in the songs of a generation, looking for the answers of a world gone mad. Boy I was premature and ignorant.

As easy as it is to be mad at the world, and the people of the world, we must remember that Jesus came to save everyone of us as we were once lost too. Luke Chapter Nine says, 

“When the days were approaching for His ascension, He was determined to go to Jerusalem; and He sent messengers on ahead of Him, and they went and entered a village of the Samaritans to make arrangements for Him. But they did not receive Him, because He was traveling toward Jerusalem. When His disciples James and John saw this, they said, “Lord, do You want us to command fire to come down from heaven and consume them?” But He turned and rebuked them, [and said, “You do not know what kind of spirit you are of; for the Son of Man did not come to destroy men’s lives, but to save them.” ] And they went on to another village.” ‭(NASB‬‬) 

People have gone from condemning the unvaccinated to the other political party, to foreign leaders and presidents. We as Christians are the worst at judging, because we don’t even share our faith with a lost and dying world. It’s not our job to condemn and pray they die, or make it seem that what is happening in the world is anyone’s fault. God has a plan and it is our privilege to share the message of His love and grace and not to call fire down on people. There is a time and place for everything, as Solomon wrote in Ecclesiastes but it is not for us to determine. Listen to what Solomon says beginning in verse one, 

“For everything there is a season, and A MATTER FOR EVERY MATTER UNDER HEAVEN: (ESV) (Emphasis added)

The things are happening and have been happening from the beginning are ordained by God. Solomon continues in verse fourteen after listing all the things there is a time for, 

“I perceived that whatever God does endures forever; NOTHING CAN BE ADDED to it, nor anything TAKEN FROM IT. God has done it, so that people fear before him. That which is, already has been; that which is to be, already has been; and God seeks what has been driven away.” (ESV) (Emphasis added)

We can’t hope to be whisked out of tribulations and pains in this earthly body, because we don't like them. We can’t change God’s word by adding or removing things to fit our wants and ways. We must be out making disciples, sharing the truths of the gospel to a lost, broken, and angry generation. I was mad at God for the things I had experienced as a child, and I was mad at life because I didn’t have what my friends had, but looking back, I was better off not going down those roads of self. It’s easy to think we deserve better, or think why do the leaders and rich not care or struggle, because they’re “bad.” But it’s not my job to judge anyone, only give them the truth and let the Holy Spirit convict their hearts, like He did mine. Solomon finishes in verse seventeen, 

“I said in my heart, GOD WILL JUDGE the righteous and the wicked, for there is A TIME FOR EVERY MATTER AND FOR EVERY WORK.” (ESV) (Emphasis added)

My hope turned from music of a lost generation, from anthems of angst and lost hope to what Psalm Fifty One says, 

“O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise.” ‭(ESV‬‬)

This was David after committing adultery and murder, where he took it upon himself to be judge and jury, and God humbled him. You may have not committed adultery, murder but have you hated your brother or neighbor? John reminds us in First John two beginning in verse nine,

“Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness. Whoever loves his brother abides in the light, and in him there is no cause for stumbling. But whoever hates his brother is in the darkness and walks in the darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes.” (ESV)

Who are my brothers? Anyone who is walking on this planet. God doesn’t look at sin like we do, or the outward appearance, but He looks at the heart. When Jesus was eating with the tax collectors, they were considered the filth and worse of Jesus time, but listen to what Jesus said in Mark Two beginning in verse fifteen, 

“And as he reclined at table in his house, many tax collectors and sinners were reclining with Jesus and His disciples, for there were many who followed Him. And the scribes of the Pharisees, when they saw that He was eating with sinners and tax collectors, said to His disciples, “WHY DOES HE EAT with tax collectors and sinners?” And when Jesus heard it, HE said to them, “Those WHO ARE WELL HAVE NO NEED OF A PHYSICIAN, but those who are sick. I CAME NOT TO CALL THE RIGHTEOUS, BUT SINNERS.”” (ESV) (Emphasis added)

So my question is, with everyone running around scared and what seems crazy, where are you running to? Man’s answers and plans that will fade, sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll, that will only leave you empty, sad and confused? We are all “sick” and need a Physician, and His Name is Jesus. My prayer is that you run to God, and realize this all was written thousands of years ago, but spoiler alert Jesus already won! David knew he had messed up and if you read all his Psalms, you’ll see his repentant heart, and he wrote in Psalm Twenty Seven, 

“I’m asking the LORD for only one thing. Here is what I want. I want to live in the house of the LORD all the days of my life. I want to look at the beauty of the LORD. I want to worship Him in his temple.” ‭(NIRV‬‬)

I want to be like David in that though I’m a sinner, I am glad that someone cared enough to share the gospel truth with me. I am not saying that you have to agree with ones lifestyle or beliefs, and definitely not to go and hang out with them at their place of worship, but how will they hear, if no one is sharing? It may be the end of the world as we know it, but I feel fine! How about you, do you know Jesus, I mean the real Jesus, if not it’s okay, He’s waiting for all who will come to Him, but do come before it’s too late!” Jose Barajas 

Game of Thorns!

“I flew in airplanes for over ten years and for about six of those it was weekly for most of those years. Thousands upon thousands of miles in various cities and various people. I took red eye flights, first one out, sat in coach, first class and ate and drank food from the airport or on the plane. I sat next to different people groups, kids, grownups, men and women and had the same flight attendants every once in a while. I always washed my hands prior to boarding, if I used the bathroom on the plane, I washed my hands, and always washed my hands when I got off the plane. I never used hand sanitizer on planes or carried any with me. I took the Greyhound weekly for 7 months from Los Angeles to Phoenix and the same, washed my hands before and after. In all those years and most of my adult life, I rarely get sick, and I mean rarely. I get a cold, maybe once a year, a fever every few years and usually only lasts for a day or less. I drink lots of water and coffee and quit drinking diet soda and before that quit regular soda for over 10 years. I have grandkids that get sick from school and I hug, and hold them and still I don’t get sick as I wash my hands regularly. I also know I’m not immune to disease and sickness as I am not stupid, but just sharing facts.

Paul wrote in Second Corinthians Twelve, beginning in verse five, 

“On behalf of this man I will boast, but on my own behalf I will not boast, except of my weaknesses— though if I should wish to boast, I would not be a fool, for I would be speaking the truth; but I refrain from it, so that no one may think more of me than he sees in me or hears from me. So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”  ‭(ESV‬‬) 

I, like Paul dont boast about my life, and what I do because I know I can get cancer, like two of my pastors did and passed away from it. There are people in my church and friends who have lost loved ones to every form of illness out there. We’ve seen random shootings, car accidents, freak accidents, and even thinking about the people who died with Kobe in a helicopter ride going to a basketball game. 

Paul prayed and it wasn’t taken from him, and skeptics will say, see God isn’t real! False prophets will say that we don’t have enough faith, or that we didn’t give enough, or believe enough.  I’ve seen social media burst out with mocking God for all the pain and suffering. I’ve seen His people afraid and cancelling events, and not going to “church” because governments said so. The writer of Hebrews reminds us in chapter ten, beginning in verse twenty three, 

“Let us HOLD FAST the CONFESSION  of OUR HOPE WITHOUT WAVERING, for HE who promised is FAITHFUL. And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, NOT NEGLECTING TO MEET TOGETHER, as is the HABIT OF SOME, but ENCOURAGING one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” (ESV) (Emphasis added)

The disciples met knowing the religious leaders were looking to kill them, because they understood that regardless of what was going on in the world, The Ancient of Days is still in control. The people of God have always been under tribulations and persecution, and they suffered and many died, but the gospel and word of God kept being preached.  The writer of Hebrews reminds us in Hebrews eleven, the hall of faith chapter in verse 

“And all these, though commended through their faith, did not receive what was promised, since God had provided something better for us, that apart from us they should not be made perfect.”  ‭(ESV‬‬) 

My faith is my faith and God will get me thru everything, regardless of what the outcome is here on earth. I hurt and deal with normal things as does everyone, but God never promised us painless, no suffering, everything will be okay. He promised us salvation and peace and a life abundantly in Him, but that word abundantly isn’t material necessarily, it’s abundant in His grace and love. I hear many quote Paul’s verse from Philippians four thirteen, 

“I CAN DO ALL THINGS through HIM who strengthens me.” (ESV) (Emphasis added)

But deny Him with their actions, their knowledge, their music, their words, and their love for one another. I know because I did the same thing! Jesus would not be allowed in too many of “America’s” churches. The thorn in Paul’s side, though inconvenient, only made him more humble, more faithful, and more bold, to continue the work he joyfully did for Jesus.

So my question is as the world gets crazier, and this is nothing compared to what is still to come, where do you put your trust? Man’s solutions will pass and not bring answers, and hiding our head in the sand won’t make things better. Drugs, Alcohol, and other escapes only make things worse. False prophets lie of peace and security, because  only God can truly save and give us peace! His security is for eternity and not necessarily for this world, His peace surpasses all understanding, and His love and salvation are free. His grace is sufficient for those who choose to trust fully in Him, for those who repent and are “healed” in His forgiveness. Let go and let God!” Jose Barajas

Promises, Promises

“When the kids were little they would ask us if they could go to Disneyland or to a store at the mall and our answer would always be, we will see. My wife always made it clear to not promise the kids because they would always and continually say, but you promised. You think nothing of it when doing it and because kids are so young we think they won’t remember, but their minds never forget anything especially when it comes to going places they want to go. When I was little my parents just flat out said no as there was no gray area or anyway to come back and tell them but you promised. They either did it or they didn’t do it and I think that is probably the best way to parent.

God’s word is filled with so many promises, He promised Abraham that through his seed, his descendants would be more than all the stars in the sky and the sand on the shore. He promised Moses that He would be with him when he led the people out of Egypt, and though the people were rebellious and ungrateful they continually complained, and still God kept his promise. Jesus made the ultimate promise by saying that He would never leave us nor forsake us, and that He would be with us until the end of the age. The problem is we choose to not believe that God isn't real, or we are like Peter who got out of the boat, but looked away from Jesus and sank. Mathew says in chapter Fourteen, 

“He said, "Come." So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, "Lord, save me." Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, "O you of little faith, why did you doubt? ‭(ESV‬‬) 

Remember right before this, the disciples had partaken in feeding Five Thousand, with just a few fish and loaves of bread. Peter, as Jesus told him, had little faith. There are so many waves and storms going on in the world and in people's lives, and instead of keeping our eyes on Jesus, we’re walking on our own, and not by faith. Paul quotes Habakkuk multiple times about walking by faith. Second Corinthians five seven days,

“FOR WE LIVE BY FAITH, NOT BY SIGHT.” (ESV) (Emphasis added) 

He also says in Romans one seventeen, 

“For I AM NOT ASHAMED OF THE GOSPEL, for it is God’s power FOR SALVATION TO EVERYONE WHO BELIEVES, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. For the righteousness of God is revealed in the gospel from faith to faith, just as it is written, “The righteous BY FAITH WILL LIVE.”” (NET) (Emphasis added)

HABAKKUK two, two through four says,

“The Lord responded: “Write down this message! Record it legibly on tablets, so the one who announces it may read it easily. For the message is a witness to what is decreed; it gives reliable testimony about how matters will turn out. Even if the message is not fulfilled right away, wait patiently; for it will certainly come to pass – it will not arrive late. Look, the one whose desires are not upright will faint from exhaustion, but the person of integrity will live because of his faithfulness.” (NET)

We can find ourselves thinking God promises us riches and healings, but not all were healed and not all were saved as faith is more than just walking with Jesus. Habakkuk says that the message is easy to read, and though it may not happen right away, to wait patiently. We can keep trying to walk on “water,” going to church, reading our bibles, but if our desires are not upright, we will faint from exhaustion. Jesus said many will fall away before He comes because they were led away, and tired of waiting on His return, or for His  promises to be fulfilled. Judas walked with Jesus for Three and a half years, and hung himself. The world makes so many promises, and constantly fails and makes people lose faith and drown in their sin. Luke eighteen eight says,

“I tell you, he will give them justice speedily. Nevertheless, when the Son of Man comes, WILL HE FIND FAITH ON EARTH?”” (NET) 

We need to believe and be in constant communion and fellowship, not just when the waves come crashing. The feel good gospels are okay for new believers, but Jesus is looking for broken and contrite, humbled faith. So my question is, do you trust God’s promises? Are you only seeking Him when life isn’t fair, and not daily and in every moment. He like my parent’s, is very straightforward with His yes and no. Revelation three says, 

“‘I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either cold or hot! So because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I am going to vomit you out of my mouth!” (NET)

Jesus wants all to come to repentance and be on fire in our faith for Him, or He will vomit us out. He will guide us and our faith can make us walk in the truth of Word, and we won’t drown in our circumstances, if we will only keep our eyes on Him. The waves are not ever going to be calm, but only He can calm the storms! That is a promise that will never be broken!” Jose Barajas

Darkness

“Our son used to live in Maricopa, AZ and we would drive out there, at least once a month. I would drive most of the time on the way up, as early as possible to get in front of the LA traffic. On the way home, we would leave early in the evening, as it was about a five hour drive. There were two stretches of just a four lane highway, and nothing but the desert and stars in the sky between Phoenix and Blythe and Blythe and Indio. I used to play my CD’s of worship music and although I'm not a fan of the Hillsong church and their false teaching, they have a great song called, “All I Need Is You.” The chorus says, “All I need is You Lord, all I need is You!” The bridge says, “You hold the universe, You hold everything on earth, You hold the universe, You hold, yeah You hold.” There is a great quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson, that says, “When it is dark enough, men see the stars!” 

John chapter one is one of the best chapters in all the Bible, and it is also one of the most misquoted and mistranslated chapters too. John begins with, 

“In the BEGINNING WAS THE WORD, and the Word WAS WITH GOD, and the WORD WAS God. “HE WAS IN THE BEGINNING with God. All things were made THROUGH HIM, and WITHOUT HIM WAS NOT ANY THING MADE that was made.” (ESV) (Emphasis added)

Who is the Word? Jesus is the Word as we will see as we read on. [Now there are those cults and false prophets who will say that instead of was; they say the original text says “a” but for today’s post, I won’t focus on that, as I am writing a few posts on the false prophets and their cults they started.]

Since the beginning Jesus was, is, and is to come, as John says in his other letter, Revelation. There is NOTHING that exists that was not made without Jesus. Too many sadly think that Jesus was created, or only appeared at the virgin birth, but that is not what the whole Bible teaches. “He holds the universe!” John continues in verse four and five, 

“In HIM WAS LIFE, and THE LIFE WAS THE LIGHT OF MAN. The light SHINES IN THE DARKNESS, and the DARKNESS HAS NOT OVERCOME IT.” (ESV) (Emphasis added)

There are so many verses in the bible, a lot of sentences, and many impactful words, but none more so, in my opinion, than these twenty five. Many people go to John Three sixteen, and though those words are awesome and the whole gospel in those sentences, none mean more to us as humans than John One, verse four and five. When we think about darkness, many think about a lot of different things, from no lights, blindness, a state of mind, drugs, or sin. Listen to what Genesis one says, 

“In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was without form and void, and DARKNESS WAS OVER THE FACE of the deep. And the Spirit of God was HOVERING OF THE FACE of the waters. And God said, “LET THERE BE LIGHT,” and there was light. (ESV) (Emphasis Added)

There was darkness before God created the light that removed the darkness, but only later, we see the darkness of sin come and take over the earth and humans. John was reminding us that though darkness was what kept humans from God, that Jesus came into this darkness, and His light was the light of man, whom He came to save. The darkness may fill the earth and sin is still something we deal with, but John reminds us that the DARKNESS has not overcome it. 

The old saying is, “You can only go up, after you hit rock bottom,” but that isn’t always true of faith and belief in God, because sadly too many see darkness and would rather stay there, than to believe in God. I have hit rock bottom, sadly a few more times than I wish to remember, because I was happy in my darkness. I had heard of Jesus, and was even “supposedly” a “Christian,” but it wasn’t until I truly saw the “darkness” that I could see Jesus (the stars). 

John was the only disciple to stand at the cross when Jesus was crucified, because he didn’t care that darkness was hanging His Lord and Savior, holding nails meant for us. He had seen Judas betray Jesus with a kiss and later hang himself because he couldn’t escape the darkness. He had heard of Peter denying Jesus after Jesus had predicted he would, but knew his friend had wept bitterly, rather than stay in darkness. John knew Jesus had come to shine the True Light of life for everyone, but he also knew that not everyone would receive the gift of life through the light of Jesus. John continues in verse nine, 

“The TRUE LIGHT, which GIVES LIGHT TO EVERYONE, was coming into the world. He was in the world, and the world was made through him, YET THE WORLD DID NOT KNOW HIM. He came to His own, and His OWN PEOPLE DID NOT RECEIVE HIM. But to all who did receive Him, who BELIEVED IN HIS NAME, He GAVE the right to become children of God, who were born, NOT OF BLOOD NOR OF THE WILL OF THE FLESH NOR THE WILL OF MAN, but of God. (ESV) (Emphasis Added)

The many times that we drove that highway and saw God’s creation through the stars and beauty all around, I sang the song, sometimes in tears because I knew I had failed my God. It wasn’t until I realized that even in my darkness, Jesus never failed me. 

John knew this as he wrote this book, remembering how hope was not lost, even though Jesus had died, because verse five of his first chapter said, “the darkness could not overcome the light” Before the creation of time, before the fruit was eaten from the forbidden tree, Jesus loved us so much, He planned to come and give His life for the people He loved. He did it for the whole world, as it says, for those who believed in His Name, He gave them the right to become the children of God. John writes in First John four nineteen, 

“We love because HE FIRST LOVED US.” (ESV) (Emphasis added)

This is not us being robots or predestined as many falsely teach, but it is true love, in that God allows us to choose Him or not. So my question is, what darkness are you experiencing? Is it a sickness, a broken marriage, a prodigal child, a lost job, the economy, the false promises of politicians, war, or pestilence? Jesus is here for anyone who needs to see the light, to remove the darkness of this world, but ultimately sin, but you have to receive His free gift by repentance. John says in First John one five, 

“This is the message we have heard from Him and proclaim to you, that GOD IS LIGHT, AND IN HIM IS NO DARKNESS AT ALL” (ESV) (Emphasis added)

When we become born again in Jesus Christ, we overcome, not by anything we do, but only by what Jesus did. John writes in First John Five beginning in verse four, 

“For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world except the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God?” (ESV)

“All I need is Your Lord, is You!” I pray you know this and come to Jesus before it is too late, and the darkness overtakes you!” Jose Barajas

Ash Ash Baby (Back to the Future)

“The practice of Ash Wednesday dates back to the 11th Century,” says Lauren F. Winner, a priest and assistant professor at Duke Divinity School. “You see that in the book Daniel in the ninth chapter there’s a line about associating fasting with ashes, so ashes are associated with penance, which is the dominant theme of Lent.” Growing up Catholic, this was ritual where we would go to church, and have a priest put a cross with ash, made from palm leaves from the previous Palm Sunday on our foreheads as a sign of us beginning a forty day fast, mirroring Jesus. We could not eat meat on Fridays, give up one thing for the whole forty days, but to me it was more about tradition, than an actual penance or renewal.

 “I mentioned how much I love the movie “Back to the Future.” Not only does it have many great quotes like, “There’s that word heavy again, is there something wrong with the Earths gravitational pull in Nineteen Eighty Five?” “I'm sure in Nineteen Eight Five plutonium is in every corner drug store, but in Nineteen Fifty Five, it’s a little hard to come by! I'm sorry, but I'm afraid you're stuck here” Who's President of the United States in Nineteen Eighty Five? Marty McFly: Ronald Reagan. Dr. Emmett Brown: Ronald Reagan! The actor? Ha! Then who is Vice President? Jerry Lewis? “The mom gets on Marty for wanting to go camping with his girlfriend, and the daughter for drinking, as she states, "how she was a good girl and didn’t do any of those things when she was growing up." When Marty goes back in time, he finds that his mom not only drink, but smoked, and snuck out with her friends. When Marty tells her in horror, you smoke too; the mom responds with, “You’re sounding like my mother!”

 

Paul in his First letter to Timothy wrote in chapter one, beginning in verse Twelve, 

 

“I thank Him who has given me strength, Christ Jesus our Lord, because He judged me faithful, appointing me to His service, THOUGH FORMERLY I was a blasphemer, persecutor, and insolent opponent. But I RECEIVED MERCY because I had acted ignorantly in unbelief, and the grace of our Lord overflowed for me with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to SAVE SINNER'S, of whom I am the foremost.” (ESV) (Emphasis Added)

 

We all have a past, and I am the first to say like Paul that I am a sinner. I have committed every sin that if people knew, would probably stop reading my writings, calling me a hypocrite. I have been an adulterer, a drunk, gotten high, been a bad husband, father, son, friend and have let Jesus down so many times, I lost count. I, unlike Marty’s mom in the movie, don’t hide the fact of who I am because God died for me, and it doesn’t give me a license to continue sinning like Paul says in Romans Six,

 

“What shall we say then? Are we to CONTINUE IN SIN THAT GRACE MAY ABOUND? BY NO MEANS! How can we who died to sin still live in it? Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were buried therefore with Him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life. For if we have been united with Him in a death like His, we shall certainly be united with Him in a resurrection like his. We know that our old self was crucified with Him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would NO LONGER BE ENSLAVED TO SIN. For one who has died has been set free from sin.” (ESV) (Emphasis Added)

 

The Bible holds back no punches, and it is candid of the past of all those whom God used. Abraham was a liar, Sarah doubted, Moses was a murder, Aaron an idol worshipper, Noah a drunk, David an adulterer and a murderer, Jeremiah a complainer and suicidal, Jonah ran from God, and Peter denied Him. Paul was also a murderer and a persecutor of God’s church, and still used all of them to change the world. I am not proud of who I was, and at times I struggle and fail God still, but I know that I hold onto what Paul says in Second Corinthians Five, 

 

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to Himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to Himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation.”  (ESV)

 

The idea of a cross on my forehead never made sense to me, because I knew whom I was, and whom my family was, and how this tradition was never taken seriously. I have written previously, we are not Jesus and our sacrifices should not be an outward appearance, but a broken and a contrite heart. The passage from Daniel nine, which is mentioned as the reason for starting this practice, is Daniel praying to God for the people of Israel who were in exile. It says,  

 

“Then I turned my face to the Lord God, seeking him by prayer and pleas for mercy with fasting and sackcloth and ashes.” (ESV) (Emphasis Added)

 

The idea of sackcloth and ashes was a way of showing regret, or sorrow for having done something wrong, and Daniel was in fervent prayer. We are no longer a part of the Old covenant and or we are not to hold to the traditions of man-made religions. As I mentioned, God, even in the Old Testament was not concerned with an outward appearance, but with a broken and contrite spirit. Jesus Himself says in Matthew Fifteen six b, through nine, quoting Isaiah Twenty Nine Thirteen,

 

“So for the SAKE OF YOUR TRADITION you have made VOID THE WORD OF GOD. You hypocrites! Well did Isaiah prophesy of you, when he said: “‘This people honors me with their lips, but their heart is far from me; in vain do they worship me, teaching as doctrines the commandments of men.’” (ESV) (Emphasis Added)

 

We are to take up our cross daily and not just do things for show, but we are to let the light of Jesus shine on our faces and our actions, for Him to get the glory and not us. He has made me white as snow, and I can share the word in truth, knowing that through my failures and experiences, I can share the grace of Christ Not by judging and thumping people, or lying of who I was, but in His truth, knowing God knows everything about me anyways! So what about you, what is your past, and where have you been? It’s okay God loves you anyways, and wants to pick you up, and cleanse your soul, and give you peace like a river!” It is like an old worship song I sing, called “He Knows My Name.” The chorus says, “He knows my name, He knows my every thought (and He loves me, He sees ear tear that falls, and hears me when I call.” Won’t you let go of your past, repent and let your future be new in Jesus Christ and Him alone?” Jose Barajas